Extreme Adventures in Motherhood (and life and knitting and photography and trying to keep a house with 3 boys from smelling like a locker room!)

Of course- I had NOTHING to do with the new look to my blog.

I received an e-mail a few days ago-from Laura She has been reading- and wanted to do something special for Extreme Adventures, look. I’ll sure say she has!

Laura was terrific to work with! She took one of my favorite pics of the little guy- and developed the whole look around it!

Laura was patient through my fumbles and changes- as well as with, my , well lets just say my “hesitation” at believing her wonderful offer! (I believe my final email said something like….”You really weren’t some crazy stalker/con artist! I didn’t think so- but you never know- online! It’s beautiful!!!!!!!! Perfect! I LOVE IT!!!!!!” )

Actually thats exactly what it said- I copy/ cut pasted! If you’re looking for web-design- I can’t recommend Laura highly enough- shes creative, good to work with, and patient!

Laura- AKA Swank Web Style thanks so much for blessing me! You certainly DID!!!!!

Starbrite Mints.

Mundane candy choice, or lesson in theology?

To me? Both.

Until a few years ago, I was part of a ministry team, we coordinated a counseling center.

One of our traditions… was STARBRITE MINTS. They were kept in little apple-shaped candy dishes, in each of the offices.

One of the incredible parts of this ministry, was that as we were volunteers, and “family” we often brought our kids to the office with us. ( I did quite a bit when we were homeschooling) There was a room that was “kid friendly” when it wasn’t being used for counseling kids- our own kids were using it. It made for interesting experiences;)

One day, I came out of a counseling session, and went to check on my guys. (To see what havoc they had caused during my absence) I happened to look in the garbage can as I passed it.

Inside, I found probably 2-3 candy dishes full of unwrapped STARBRITE MINTS. I was peeved, to say the least.

I also found a pile of mint wrappers, hoarded on a table.

I disciplined the wasteful culprit. I cleaned up the office, with their help- and tossed the whole mess in the trash.

Later, (after Mom had chilled out a bit) My middle guy explained….

“You threw out my mint wrapper collection”.

“Mint Wrapper Collection?” (that was a new one)

My attitude toward the incident changed. It wasn’t REALLY an intentional wastefulness, it was a childish creative endeavor. I had thrown out what I had seen as “garbage’, and what was really a precious “collection”.

Later- after sharing the story with some friends- they quickly acted to rectify the “injustice and loss” that my guy had suffered. They each carefully, unwrapped their precious “Dove” chocolates, smoothed the wrappers, and collected them in an envelope.

A new “Mint Wrapper Collection” was born. One that wasn’t based on waste- (intentional or otherwise) but, one that was a gift of love.

My son still remembers. Somewhere, in the clutter of our home- is an envelope with those wrappers.

Now- they serve me, as a reminder of intent, and perspective.

I think we’re all tempted to jump to judge anothers intent. I did. I saw wrappers, I saw mints- it added up to intentional waste, to me. On the surface, it was. But, underneath? It wasn’t. The intent was collecting the precious. I think, too often I do the same with others. Although I HATE math… I see something, and to my mind it’s simple algebra: A+B=C.
Action (witnessed) + Bold assumption (on my part) =Careless assessment . I take my opinion on what someones intent must be, and act as if it’s fact. (ummm let’s just say, the mint wrappers weren’t the last time I did that!)

Math may be simple- (well… not so much for me;) but people are NOT.

I also think we’re pretty quick to see some of the people and things that God loves and treasures, as garbage. When actually, they are His own “Mint Wrapper Collection”.
The wrapper, the part that I would have tossed, my son, gathered as precious. God is more like Matt, then me.

Ocassionally, I meet someone, who “rubs me the wrong way” I feel like it would be better to ignore that person, or not deal with them. (of course- it would be better for us all around)

In a way- I’m tempted to toss them like trash, out of my life.

I think we need to be careful, we need to be reminded of each person’s value and preciousness in God. I want to be like Matt (my middle guy) I want to collect what others would toss, I want to hold precious all of God’s treasures. The truth is- I am often one of those people. I rub the wrong way. I irritate. I frustrate and aggravate. To some, I am a Mint Wrapper. The truth is- we all could be- to someone.

I want to be a “Mint Wrapper Collector”

Dear Lord, I pray, that you’d grow me in love, that you’d help me to see areas where I’m judging anothers intent, and am sooo wrong. I ask you to forgive me Lord, I pray that you’d help me to treat others as the treasures they are- even when they irritate and frustrate, I love you Lord- amen.

I can hear a sweet (thought politically incorrect, in a way- but not in INTENT, song..)

Jesus Loves the Little Children….

Jesus Loves the little Children,
All the children of the world,
Red and Yellow, Black and White
All are precious in His sight
Jesus Loves the Little Children of the World.

I’ve re-written it for fun…..and challenge:

Jesus Loves The Annoying:

Jesus loves the annoying
All the tough ones in the world,
Crabby, grumpy, right and wrong,
All are precious in His sight
Jesus loves annoying people,
- me and you!

And we should too. ;)

There is a new post over at Missional Mom- today- fyi;)

http://missional-mom.blogspot.com/
Its my adventure on the way home from Summer school, Today!

Caution: This is a GIRLFRIEND POST.

If you are a male and arrived here by” googling ” bra, boob or anything similar, you’ll want to click away. It’s not THAT kind of post.

If you are a friend, and happen to be male- click away- and save us both the embarrassment.

If you’re a girlfriend, put down your beverage- and get ready to laugh.

Are the men gone yet?

OK- First- I promise the picture is relevant. Besides- there will be no posting of bra pictures on my blog;)

Next- I know I may NEVER hear the end of this- but in light of my friends ribbing about knittng, and my constant goal of authenticity… I thought I’d share an embarrasing knitting moment.

OK, onto the show:

Everything started out fine. I was sitting on the couch, relaxed, knitting away on some socks……Something freaked me out- (I am so traumatized I don’t remember WHAT it was, probably the boys fighting….) I dropped my knitting- and leaned forward, to jump up—

When I heard a “SNAP”. and felt a sharp pain in my….well… in my bra area :(!

I looked down, to find my knitting needle snapped in three places! And poking into my bra! My mind flashed with a vision of the MOST humiliating ER visit of my life…..Over the hospital intercom.. I could already hear—-not “CODE BLUE” in room 2, but” IMPALED BOOB, In ROOM 2!”

I could see my story ending up on some lame TV show… names changed for my privacy, of course…

Scene 1:
a woman walks in with her boob IMPALED- ACCIDENTLY, on a KNITTING needle.

Flash to the next scene….
The doctors are standing in the x-ray room, looking at the x-ray, wondering how to save the woman’s life. In the show- the needle would have, of course have come precariously close to her heart…….It would require consultation after consultation……humiliation upon humiliation…. all, over a knitting injury. Leaving it would be dangerous— (not to mention uncomfortable) Removing it, could be deadly……oh the horror!

Final scene—
Woman is recovering from her emergency Needlectomy, the camera zooms onto the doctors prescription pad.. where he (The Sarcastic Doctor– there is one in EVERY Medical show) is writing her prescription for release….”NO KNITTING”.

Fortunately, after a quick assessment- I realized- that yes- my underwire had saved me. There was no wound. Not even a mark, or bruise.

WHEW. My modesty was salvaged. (until I posted this;)

Maybe police officers should try underwire as a cheap replacement for kevlar. ;)

The bummer? Although GREATLY thankful that I was not harmed— It WAS a set a Lantern Moon US #1 DPN’s that I snapped. How sad. (it was NOT the project in the picture)

The moral of the story?

Never knit in the nude. ALWAYS wear your underwire, you never know, it could just SAVE YOUR LIFE! Mine did. (well… not REALLY)

PS this is an entirely ridiculous post.
I know this. ;) Just thought I’d give ya fodder for giggles, to brighten your day!

Measuring tapes are amazing things. First off- at my house, at least, they have the uncanny ability to disappear into thin air.

I buy them, use them once- then they are gone. I buy boxes for them, I store them carefully- yet, when I need them again *poof* they pull a Houdini and disappear!

My next- problem with measuring tapes, well, we all use them a little differently. Some measure everything, others “eyeball” most things, except those that are most important. (I’m an eye-baller, myself)

Even in light of all this, when you can FIND one, a
a measuring tape is a great tool. MOST of the time.

Personally, I struggle with measuring tapes ocassionally. I tend to use them in ways that aren’t “recommended” on the label….
Because I use them in two ways that can be damaging to myself, and to others.

I use them to see if I”measure up”, and to see how others “Measure down”.

Tape measures should be labeled as dangerous when used improperly.

Here is what I mean. Sometimes, I use a measuring tape of standards (usually that I create, sometimes based on God’s word, with my own creative twists added for emphasis) to see if I’m doing “ok”. If I’m a “better” mom, wife, daughter, worker, housekeeper, etc… than “so and so” than I must be doing alright. That’s measuring down.

We use someone elses failures- as our “baseline” for how we measure in comparison.

Then, there is the opposite mis-use. The one, where I compare myself to someone else- and find myself “lacking” or not measuring up, as if they are the standard that, I should strive for.

Either way, this is a lose- lose situation. As long as I’m looking to others for my standard, or my “measuring tape”, I have lost focus on what’s most important. God’s standard.

If I think I’m “Doing ok” because I’m doing better than someone else- that can become pride. If I think I am NOT doing well enough, because someone else measures differently, in an area, then I may start to resent, or even envy them.

There is only one who can measure, any of us, and the truth is, we are all found “measuring short”…

Roman’s 3-22-26
This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.

The truth is- none of us measure up, yet when God measures- He measures through the loving sacrifice of His Son. When I remember that, my tape measure can takes it’s right and useful, role, for hanging pictures and measuring knitting in progress!

The amazing thing about God- is that He alone knows how we measure- and loves us anyways!

Dear Lord- I ask that you’d help me to allow the measuring to be left to you- that I’d learn to keep your standards, and have tem in my heart, I love you Lord- amen!

Ps.. I need to actually measure something– does anyone know where my actual tape measure might be???

Last week I sent a few packages out— No, NOT Brownies;) ..gifts for my secret pal exchange…. this weekend- I got some goodies, myself!

In the pic- you can see the great treats my Secret Pal 8 sent— beautiful hand dyed fingering weight—— LOADS of it! I’ve been looking for yarn that reminds me of my favorite flowers— PANSIES. I found some- IN MY MAILBOX! This it beautiful!

There is also some yummy soap and a cute- way cute for a mom in a house of MEN,loofa in the shape of a flower! :) They WON’T Touch this!

Finally- some Lorna’s Laces in a great springy colorway!

WOW. Thanks so much SP*!

(If you’re wondering WHAT SP8 is– you can click the posts title—it’s knitting gift exchange- check it out;- it’s a lot of fun)

Today was a great day- I attended a Knitting Fundraiser- at Skeins on Main, http://www.skeinsonmain.com/ in Rochester, MI. I met a number of great knitters- and had a great little “break”;) For a good cause! The shop is great- atmosphere- and staff are wonderful- yarn selection is terrific- lots of extra’s and needles- it’s worth the drive.

Friday- I received another package- I also received a beautiful heathered purple skein of Cascade wool- from my One Skein Pal- http://www.oneskein.com/secretpal.asp I’ll post a pic on monday— blogger is strange with pics today…THNX!!!!!

I’m one pooped blogger, and am teaching in the morning- so gotta get some rest.

Dear Lord- Thanx for those that are blessing me with gifties and encouragement- please also bless those I’m gifting- I Love you Lord, and thank you for a nice restful day! amen.

Christian Women Online- Announced a Team Blog, a few weeks ago, with open applications…. GUESS WHAT?????

Hee Hee.. They picked me. ;)

I’d like to thank the academy, the little (and not so little) people who live at my house and give me fodder for blogging, and of course, My Darling Husband……

Ok. Listen. This may be my only chance to give an acceptance speech. Let me have my moment, will ya?

Anyway- I’ve already put up my first Post “Confessions of a Labeling Label Hater”, you can view it by clicking the title, to this entry.

I’m excited to be able to blog with such a great group of women, and really feel honored to be chosen. Let’s face it, when you put stuff out there-online, you hope it means something to someone!

No worries- though- this blog will remain the status quo for me. I’ll just also be posting at the new blog about once a week.

Don’t worry about the pride thing- God’s got that one covered already-

Everytime I get a little puffed up with pride, over some opportunity that God opens up for me… I get some little reminder of humility. Like the time I was asked to speak at a group, got stuck in traffic, then rushed to fix my make-up in the car to “look like the professional I am” until I realized, that in my haste I had used black EYELINER to line my lips….. “Goth Momma” may be fine for some… but it’s not the look I was going for.

I also remember the time I got my first “Business Cards” complete with fancy holder, and pridefully whipped out my cards to offer to someone- until I looked down and found “Mystery Goo” all over the card I had pulled out AND my fancy case….. (”Mystery goo” is our families term for goo that is naturally exuded through the finger tips of toddlers)

Not too impressive- to pass out goobered up business cards.

Anyway- I’m looking forward to connecting with other women through the team blog- it’s a NEW ADVENTURE! Gotta love that!

Dear Lord- I pray that you’d fill me with your Spirit, help me to write and speak in ways that encourage and challenge, I love you Lord- and acknowledge- that it’s all about YOU, not me!amen!

The title says it all. Well, it says MOST of it….

Sara- @ http://seasonsofgrace.blogspot.com/ posted about God’s plan- verses ours…(scroll to the 21st..(but enjoy the scroll- she’s got a great heart for God!) … Sara challenged me think about, when I was a kid. I remembered what I thought my life would be like…I thought for sure my title would be something like this….

Dr. Princess Barbie, Dancer Singing-Writer, Mommy Nun.

It may not make sense. It may not have been possible, some of the “titles” can’t even be held by the same person, (the logistics just don’t work;mommy/nun don’t go together…) But, hey- I was a KID.

If I compare my actual life to my dream life- it could be depressing. But- honestly, it’s not. I think it’s a matter of perspective.

I remember thinking I wanted to be SMART. I had a hard time in elementary school, I was ADD before ADD existed…. my report cards all said the same thing…. “Tracey needs to pay more attention to her work, and stop talking to her neighbors…..Tracey needs to spend less time daydreaming, and more time working…..”

Let’s just say- my kids have seen my report cards- and they are NOT intimidated. I spent a lot of time thinking I was dumb. Determined, stubborn child/woman that I am, my only response was- to PROVE them wrong…..So, to me, that meant being a doctor. (I thought Doctor’s knew EVERYTHING, until I got pregnant- and then, I found out how many things they just don’t understand!)

Am I Doctor? Duh. NO. Yet- to my guys- I am the ER Doc of choice. Handling blood, knocked out teeth, broken fingers, gashes, and bruises. As for smart— well- report cards aside, I love learning with my guys, I’ve learned that being smart, is more about learning than Doctorates.

Princess. Yeah- I was up at four in the morning to see Diana become a princess, before my very eyes. Girls are often enamoured with the “princess concept”. When I look at my list, now, I realize that one was gonna be a stretch. I was born to a warehouse worker and a highschool grad. Princesses are usually born, ummmm to royalty.

All these years later, though- there are days when I KNOW I am a Princess. A child of God, The King of the Universe. Yeah- that makes me a princess. Day to day? I only bring my tiara out for special ocassions…..but, well- trust me, I’m the princess/queen of this house. (I’m the only female- I hold the title by default;) There are moments when my Husband, and my boys look at me- and I FEEL like a princess- that’s good enough for me.

Barbie? K. Not so much on this one. Barbie is a ridiculous, unattainable goal. But- we all know the goal there, is a physical one. Barbie is a childhood goal of beauty.

I’ll NEVER look like Barbie. Yet- to the guys at my house- I am beautiful…. in the words of my Noah… “Mommy, you’re so beautiful, I can’t take my eyes off you” (In answer to your question- yes- whatever he asked for after that statement- he DID receive;) I may not be beautiful in the eyes of the world… but to my God- and my guys…. I’m Barbie, only better……(I don’t tip over from the disproportion! )

Dancing Singer, Writer? Well, we dance when we want, to. Yes, ocassionally in public. Singer? At the top of my lungs….. especially in the car! And definitely in worship. Writer? Well, this blog, and one published article may be as close as it gets. But it’s here. And so are you- so thanks for reading, and making my dream come true;)

Mommy? Without a doubt. Three times over- to three phenomenal sons- that has surpassed all my dreams! I’m also, Mom. MOTHER (when they’re disgusted with me, or I’ve embarrassed them) Mommy Dearest when they feel snotty;) Sweety Momma when the little guy wants something… yeah- this one is a fact.

Nun? Hmmmm well- I wear a lot of black. ( I KNOW nuns don’t necessarily wear black…….) Really- I think as a kid- I thought of Nun’s as having a special connection to God. I just didn’t know that God wanted to have a special connection (relationship) with each of us.

That- by His grace, I have. As can you.

Have all my dreams come true? In a way, yes. The dreams I had- have changed, as have my understanding of them. But one thing is for sure—- God had a plan, all along!

Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future

Ephesians 1:11In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will…

Dear Lord- I know that you have always been with me, I thank you for the dreams you’ve planted in my heart- both the ones I’ve already seen come true- and the ones I’ve yet to dream. I also thank you for a new perspective- that sees your plan as better than mine! I love you Lord- and trust your plan for all my life- amen

In case you’re wondering where I’ve been……..

On Friday…. I was over come with toxic fumes. I have been going thru detox ever since…..it’s an intensive home recovery process- but I think I’m on the mend.

It began with preparation for a party— (accidents always happen that way.. don’t they?) At first I felt fine…. Batches 1-3 went off without a hitch- but somewhere between batches 4-13… thigs get a little hazy.

All I know- is- I awoke to find myself and the boy- on the kitchen floor- brownie batter clinging to our chins- and spatulas clasped like swords for battle in our hands…..

The fumes were found to be predominately safe, (by the brownie inspectors called for these occasions) after careful evaluation…. . the source of the fumes was determined to be my own OVEN.

Specifically: the 300 brownies I baked in it!!!!!! (For a graduation party.. my friends son, whom we love— of course;)

Friday was a blur- stir, mix bake and cool… cut plate start again…. and again….

There were:

Mint Chocolate chip brownies
White Chocolate Chip
White Chocolate Chip with Walnuts
Peanut butter chip
M&M Mini Brownies
Oreo Brownies
Mounds Brownies
Peanut butter chip w/ walnuts
Heath Pecan Crunch

COUNTLESS Batches in 9×13 pans…..(you accumulate a number of those in 18 years of marriage—-btw) WAY too much fun all around;) ( I love baking) Noah thoroughly enjoyed “sprinkling” toppings of all sorts.

But…..Please, nobody say BROWNIE.;) It is the NEW B word. (least at my house it is)

I started Saturday morning- baking 15 pounds of barbeque meatballs—- (also for the party…;)

Party was awesome- all day poolside event- Noah made new friends…..(he does that;) and got his first sunburn (mom’s fault) We all had a great time…

Sunday way Fathers Day- so we devoted ourselves to makin’ Daddy Happy.
He got “Guitar Hero” (Playstation game extraordinaire) and a gps for camping;) (had one previously- that was stolen from our car. :( )

After a few HOURS of Guitar Hero— we headed out to Great Lakes Crossings- to go to
Rain Forest Cafe— then saw “Nacho Libre” Like I said- it was a day all about makin Daddy happy;) Ended the day with a quick trip to the new IKEA. Holy cow- that place is NUTS.

Bought a few things- but, could have bought LOADS. Good prices- cute stuff;) I admit it— I liked it.

As for me– I knit— and knit— and knit— (there was plenty of time between brownie batches.) I added repeats to my “Amazing Lace” Project…. and I crossed, yet another knitting line….

I’ve knit WASHCLOTHES. Yes. I know. Another Thing I thought I’d never do… but they are quick- simple- and cute— and will be wonderful gifties with a bath bomb wrapped in each one- tied up with a ribbon….;)

In the background is my sanity saver project….. the basket weave shawl in Noro Silk Garden Lite…The striping is pretty— but the Noro- is pretty knotty and has too much vegetable matter in it for me… the only sticks I like in my knitting are my needles. It’s also not so soft— so am hoping a soak will soften it up a bit— but the stripes are pretty, has a nice halo to it, and the colors are great… so I’m good- it will be perfect for cold nights sitting around the fire when we’re camping;)

The cute washclothes are from Mielkes Farms— it’s a free pattern- in Sugar and cream cotton (hello Walmart) They are quite cute- so I have a number more in my line-up—- Finally- My Amazing Lace Project….

I’m thinking I have the lace pattern down down now- occasional errors- are quickly found and fixed… but this will be my first project with a border that is knit-on— I’m starting to feel panicky about it—- but- I’ll give it a shot. Worst case- I can always- knit it separate and sew it on…. but hopefully not-

Later I’ll be posting my entry to the Amazing Lace Challenge #3… I’m still trying to recover from being sick- and then overcome with brownie fumes;)

shhhhhhhh just say no to brownies;)

Knit Sock Kit Pal

The Questionnaire:

What are your favorite colors? Purple, Fuschia, Turquoise, black (jewel tones;)

Are you a new sock knitter? Not NEW, but you know.. learning.. How long have you been knitting socks? About a year and a half.

Do you prefer solid or multicolored yarn? Both. If it’s yarn- and soft and pretty… I’m good;)
What fibers do you prefer in sock yarn? Natural— but blends hold up a bit better- and I do suffer with knitters fear.. of my socks falling apart;)

Where do you usually knit socks? Where ever I happen to be, I happen to BE knitting….

How do you usually carry/store small projects? Bags of every sort and size and color– I am a bag-lady in waiting.

What are your favorite sock knitting patterns? The one I’m working on currently- what ever THAT is;)

What are your favorite sock knitting techniques? Only know how to do top down— looking to grow.

What new techniques would you like to try? Toe up- then on circs… then magic loop– did I miss anything? Add that. ;)

Do you prefer circulars or dpns for sock knitting? So far DPNs

What are some of your favorite yarns? KOIGU. Socks That Rock…. Interlacements toasty toes… louet gems……… Schaeffer Anne…

What yarn do you totally covet? All. (well- maybe NOT COVET.. that would be bad– but you know- I love yarn)

Any pattern you would love to make if money and time were no object? Afraid of the tiny needles for jaywalkers— but if time were no object… the birch leaf socks from Gathering of Lace- (again size 0’s… I’m a get it done kinda girl;)

Favorite kind of needles (brand, materials, straights or circs, etc)?

Lantern Moons, Brittany Birch, Bryspun flexibles… swallow casein…(except the bad dog Sami eats them) Rt needle for the rt yarn. I like the 5-6″ size…. longer is too hard to mover quick–I am a continental / combination knitter- I’m all about fast;)

If you were a specific kind of yarn, which brand and kind of yarn would you be? I’d like to think I was koigu—nicely evenly spun smooth to knit… but probably AM some crazy mish mash novelty yarn;)

Do you have a favorite candy or mail-able snack? CHOCOLATE.

What’s your favorite animal? sheepies at the moment.

Do you have pets? What are their species/names/ages? 2 cats Cappucino and Truffles, and a Dog- Sami (Bad but sweet Beagle)

If you were a color what color would you be?

Describe your favorite shirt (yours or someone else’s).. Hot pink. (fuschia) or plain white

What is your most inspiring image, flower, or object in nature?

Black and white pics of trees, (esp in the winter) beach, flowers..etc.. love them.

Tell me the best quote you’ve ever heard or read. So many quotes- so little time…

Preach the Gospel at all times - If necessary, use words.–St. Francis of Assisi

In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. Mother Teresa

“God will look to every soul like its first love because He is its first love.”
–The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis

“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. “ William Shakespeare

Do you have a wishlist? nope

Anything else you’d like to share with the group today?

I’m a mom of 3 boys- I knit while we fish. ummm and have been accused of knitting at stop lights- and I don’t see that as a problem. I have the best husband ever. That is all.

HI- My name is Tracey, I am not a Sunday School Project.

I think I should have had a name tag that read something like that, when I first started going to church.

It was a (fairly) small church. Everyone knew everyone (and- everyone’s business, on occasion) My Boyfriend (now husband) and his family had been going there for years. Everyone was thrilled that his “missionary dating” experience.. had turned out for the best……(;)

They were genuinely glad- that I wanted to know more about God.

It was a good place- I was able to learn a lot, I could ask questions in classes…. People were friendly, they cared. They weren’t as strange as I thought they were- on first meeting them. I even started to like them. ;)

Somewhere along the line- a couple of years into it- actually- after we were married….”it ” happened. I became a “Sunday School Project”

Feeling like a “Sunday School Project” is not a good thing. It started simple enough…

Another mom befriended, me. kind of.

We had kids of similar age— we were the same age…… and although she did possess the holy trinity of feminine jealousy (she was tall, thin AND BLONDE) I liked her.

But, something made me feel like I was her personal “project”.

It’s hard to explain.

I think it was because it was all about me. We talked about how I was. We prayed about my prayer requests. We studied, to find answers to my questions…..

(It wasn’t altogether bad;)

But- it wasn’t really a relationship. It was one-way. She was the GIVER. I was the RECEIVER. It almost felt like I, being infinitely less mature, could only be the cup- for her outpouring.

Ok. That’s a bit melodramatic. But- the point is- I felt less valuable somehow. And yet- my relationship with Christ- felt, so, well.. NOT that.

I felt valued and loved- and uniquely designed- because of what the Bible said….. but in the relationship with this friend…I there FELT like some spiritual glass ceiling was between us.

Bottom- line- it made me feel like “project” not a person.

I’m not honestly sure, if it was me- the relationship- or her. But something wasn’t right.

We had fun. I learned. But that was about it. I called her friend- (and she did the same, I think) but it wasn’t that girlfriend, sister- love- thing.

Later- we (My husband and I) changed churches (TOTALLY unrelated) I started to meet new people. They were different. I met women who liked me. They gave to me. Some were older- some the same age- others younger…. This was different. We wondered together- we asked questions- together, we encouraged each other. They received what I had to give—We gave to each other whatever we had to give.

This was sister-love-God stuff.

Looking back, I see a totally different response in me. One set of relationships made me feel like a project, another set made me feel a “part”. The only real difference I can see- is in the mutuality of the relationships.

In Mark 12— a story is told— about a woman’s small offering….

The Widow’s Offering

41Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. 42But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins,[a]worth only a fraction of a penny.[b]
43Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. 44They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on.”

Funny- my first instinct, when someone- who I know doesn’t have much- wants to give to me— is to say— “no, you keep it” I want them to hold onto what they have. Yet, Jesus received the Widows Mite, and did it actually- with respect, and great joy. I wonder how she would have felt or responded- had He rejected it- even if out of concern for her?

Another time- a woman comes to where Jesus is, sits at His feet- and breaks a beautiful expensive box of perfume over them… then- she lovingly wiped them clean with her hair. The disciples got seriously ticked off. They were mad that she had wasted so much— (they could have sold it on eBay, maybe?) and used the money for ministry..

But- Jesus’ response was different. He welcomed her gift. He said it was to prepare Him for His death.. she gave something- and Jesus received it— and it ministered to Him in preparation for the CROSS!

I’ve been looking at my relationships- all of them. The ones that are cursory, the ones that are deep. And I’m wondering…. do I make people feel like Sunday School Projects?

I think that God is showing me- that the way we reach out- is thru love. But what is love? Is it giving? Yes. It is. But it’s also in receiving. The relationships that have brought me closer to God- have been the ones that were mutual. The ones that felt like we were on a journey together. The ones where whatever I had to give was received. And I received, what others had to give.

Even when surrounded by people who had much more than me, spiritually (their experience and knowledge) and physically, when the relationships are mutual, I don’t feel like a “project”.

I’ve been going to a “spinning class”.(as in yarn, not exercise;) I have felt that I am there for a purpose….. and I’ve been watching for the “God Moments”… the openings to share my faith……. etc…

This morning- while looking back- I’m looking forward- and I’m wondering… here are these women.. (4 of them all over 65) I’ve been wanting to GIVE them so much… but- what if- part of God’s plan- is that I receive from them? Their wisdom, their experience….. especially in a culture- that devalues those who aren’t “young”…

What if, in my RECEIVING, I am giving them a sense of honor? Of Value? Of God? Of Love and appreciation? What if that is the key to their hearts?

I’m not sure… but I’ll be honest- I DON’T want these women to feel like Sunday school projects. I want them to be loved. By God. Through me. However that needs to look.

Dear Lord- as I look at the relationships in my life that have changed me so much- I see that they have been mutual, not a “tit for tat” keeping accounts kind of mutual, but lovingly mutual- one who has- gives- one who needs receives…. I pray that I can take that kind of love to others- and that in reaching out to them- they feel loved- and not like a “project”…I love you Lord-and am so thankful for all the people you have put in my life- and for all that you will be…Amen