dirt. seeds. the question ? .. will they grow?

Had I touched them- probably not. (I call myself the “kervorkian” of plants…. only plants who are ready to die end up at my doorstep)

But the boy? Along with his dirty nails…he’s got a green thumb. The seeds he planted last weekend- have already sprouted. They were in a “Veggie Tales” Learning kit. Cute. A great introduction into gardening. Although, try to convince a 5 year old that his BOB AND LARRY VEGGIE TALES GARDEN will be growing FLOWERS…. and he’ll announce: “That’s just wrong.” Take my advice, if you want to avoid circular reasoning. Buy the veggie kit. It’s a tough argument to win.

Best part? Noah got to practice gardening- and I didn’t have to muck up my nails. ;) (Hate getting dirt under my acrylics…sand is ok…. but dirt? HATE that.)

The Spring Cleaning Frenzy, is just about complete. Not perfect- but, boy is this place in better shape than it was.

It was also- A. Lot. Of. Work. Blah. Knitting has been slow- as cleaning has taken precedence. I haven’t been doing much writing- either- ’cause mostly- I just need to get my house in order. Balance should be restored shortly. The pendulum swings. (So do my hormones)

My experiment with the “Fly Lady” (think: flying. Not BUGS.) is successful. Annoying at times… but successful. (I’ve already admitted that I don’t like to be told what to do. And, just to maintain my autonomy- and remain true to myself, I ocassionally “defy the fly”… just cause I can. I’m THAT mature. It’s true.)

To celebrate the progress- (and the fact that I can go to bed without moving laundry off of it first) I bought new sheets- from Target. On clearance- of course. Our local Target store has them for 50% off. They are 800 thread count- and cheap as I am…(we still sleep on sheet from our wedding shower….in 1988. They aren’t in the “rotation that often- but they are- it’s true;) I have to admit I will probably go buy some more this afternoon. They are soft and smooth, as can be.

These sheets make me want to make my bed and then, lie in it. I think I’ll take a nap!

 

Random update….chevron scarf, still cleaning……If you give a room a cleaning, it will need to be vacuumed….

Chevron Scarf stats: here

Still making progress, though it’s mostly in snippets, between bouts of cleaning.

If you give a room a walk through-

If you give a room a walk through,

It will ask you to be cleared.

If you clear the clutter,

It will ask you for a dusting.

If you dust it,

It will cry for fingerprints to be cleaned.

If you wipe the prints,

It will whine to have cobwebs cleared.

If you clear the cobwebs,

you’lll notice the dirt in the carpets corners

If you vacuum up the dirt,

The carpet will need to be cleaned.

If you clean the carpet,

You’ll notice the messy bookcase.

If yu straighten up the bookcase,

The entertainment center calls your name.

If you clean the entertainment center-

You’ll notice the windows need to be wiped

If you wipe the windows,

You’ll notice the sills are covered in dust.

If you wipe the sills,

You’ll notice the curtains need to be washed.

While you’re washing the curtains,

The pillows will look funky.

If you wash the pillows,

You’ll notice the couch cushions need to be vacuumed.

If you vacuum the cushions….

You’ll need to lie down.

If you lie down…. you’ll notice more dirt.

Close your eyes- you’ve done enough.

(Loosely based on “If you give a mouse a cookie” a favorite at our house)

(Working in the livingroom this week…. can you tell? This afternoon’s planned task? Move the couch and clean out from underneath it——THAT should be interesting…. probably some home-brewed- hard cider under there—-I think Noah’s been experimenting with micro-brewing in juiceboxes under there….)

The windows in my living-room are currently naked. As a reward for making progress in my spring cleaning, I picked up new sheers. The new sheers are in the dryer- trying to remove the wrinkles without actually ironing. (I don’t iron without causing damage;) The light coming in today is lovely… I love sunshine! (Couldn’t resist taking pics…a short diversion -also between cleaning bouts.)

I’m still on track with “Flylady.net” . It’s interesting doing work in 15 minute increments….(although- I tend to run over the timer;) I don’t feel like I have to work the current area all at once- until it’s finished. (Which was just making me feel overwhelmed and then, procrastinate :0!)

I do however have a desperate question….

If I give my dog* pseudophed- will she stop leaving dog snot nose-prints on the windows?????? It’s driving me NUTS!

Dear Lord- I thank you for the sunshine streaming through the windows and for the rain that’s making everything start to bloom….I love you Lord- amen.

***Please don’t bother calling PETA….Bad Dog Sami isn’t being drugged— I’ve been tempted- but not yet sinned;)

sorry for the re-posts- trouble with blogger today;)

 

An Apology To Our Garbage Men……Waste Management Specialists…Eco-rescuers…. whatever.

Dear Garbage Men - (Insert appropriate and updated terminology please-)

This morning- I want to express my sincerest apology. The mountain of trash in front of my home, is putting you behind schedule- and quite possibly at risk of minor injury. Please- for the love of all things clean- LIFT WITH YOUR LEGS… not your backs.

I am embarassed by the mountain before my home- but wish to explain. We’ve been doing serious “Spring Cleaning”. Please be extra careful with the bags from the garage….if they smell like something has died in there- well it’s because something did. You can click to read about the mousecapade. Really, they had to go…a sad reality.

Some of the bags are really heavy and squishy. That’s because they contain my “skinny clothes”.. (weird how that worked out, huh? The Skinny Clothes are heavy;) Most were given away… but these are the ones that ticked me off, ’cause I just don’t see my backside fitting into them regardless of how many hours I spend on the exercise bike. This was an act of therapeutic value- they’ve been in my closet upsetting me for months. Getting rid of them was good for me. Sorry, if it’s bad for you.

Some of the bags are quite lumpy. Be extra careful not to spill them. They are the extraneous contents from under 3 bathroom sinks. I don’t recommend allowing the chemicals (the dregs of various cleaners- hair products, skin products that make your skin look older and yet, have acne at the same time…grand investment.) to mix or spill on you. It wouldn’t be prudent. I think there was a bottle of Nair in there- and though it doesn’t work on us Italian women, I’m pretty sure it’ll eat your skin off- or at least cause baldness. Be forewarned.

I suppose I should also confess that I waited until after dark to take the garbage out- and was tempted to add a couple of our bags to my neighbors trash-(well ALL my neighbors trash, not exactly actually sharing the love) — so it didn’t look like we were such pigs….. but I was pretty tired- and, besides, that felt like lying a bit- so I didn’t. But, I thought about it. Sorry. I want our relationship to be healthy- so, I promise to keep things honest.

I really wanted to bake you cookies or something- cause I know this was WAY over our garbage quota…. but I just didn’t think putting cookies out on top of the trash - even in a ziplock bag- would be a good idea. Besides- my cookies are pretty awesome and they could possibly revive the mice- and we don’t need zombie mice attacking our wonderful garbage men… that would be bad.

In closing—Again- I want to apologize for our exorbitant out put of trash this week. I’m sorry to be such a pain. Thanks for all your hard work-

Sincerely-

the piggies in a clean house-(and garage) in Michigan…..

PS……the Bob the Builder couch on top? DON’T take it home to the kiddies…. the “bad cat” mistook it for a litterbox.

PPS—- Please know this- I- (a 3o “something” mom of three- carried most of those heavy bags to the curb. don’t try the “those bags are too heavy for us” thing…. I’ll keep putting them out- every week till the cows come home- or you take them…so you can do it now— or when they grow even more disgusting- it’s up to you.)

To compensate for a post full of garbage….. here is some pretty:

 

Of Mice and Men

The hunters enter with a glint in their eye. Their faces are set, in determination.

There is also a small glimmer of hope, at the corners of their eyes, both that they will today catch the hunted, and that the hunted will escape, to be hunted again.

They are prepared for battle. They carry their weaponry proudly, in the same manner as the generations that have gone before them. The elder hunter teaches the 2 younger hunters how to read animal signs and prepare for the hunt. Traps are set- further weapons are readied. Together, they search out the hunted. Every fiber of their beings- tense and waiting for action.

They are not on an African Savanna, They are not deep in the jungle or in a forest of untold age and depth….. they are in my garage. They are hunting mice. Not exactly big game. However, you’d think they were slaying dragons the way they proclaim “ANOTHER ONE!” With pride.

They are ridding the world of field mice, one mouse at a time. And they are driving me nuts. It has meant- 3 trips to Home Depot for traps of varying types and prices… nearly a full jar of peanut-butter (The little guy suggested adding jelly- as he prefers PBJ’s to plain peanut butter;) And a number of fake smiles, as I pretend to be thrilled with the results of their “hunt”. At least they aren’t trying to make me look at it…. they just want me aware of their “score”… At the moment I believe it is 6.

Although, I’m a little concerned over their enjoyment of the sport, I’m also quite glad this isn’t one aspect of Spring cleaning that I have to take care of. My approach would be to attempt to catch the mice alive- and let them go-somewhere far, far away– which would involve my physical proximity to said mice–putting them into some kind of chew-proof container- and then DRIVING them to the “country.” Not gonna happen.

I think I’ll leave this one to my guys.

All hail the conquering heroes!…..Hunters of mice.

No pic today, as I just don’t have the heart to post mousey cuteness…. it’s too sad.

*****every spring the mice try to move into the garage…. every spring it results in mouse carnage of domestic proportions….will they never learn? Apparently, not.

PS—- men are weird.

Today is TUESAY—- So, you know— I’m posting at LACED WITH GRACE…… today’s post?
“My Martyrdom?… or Not. ” A little clue— the answer is NOT.

 

Cold Medicine + Cleaning fumes= Trippy Spring Cleaning Illness

If I start my day with Dayquil…

Continue my day by snorting cleaning chemicals…..

and finish my day with Nyquil……

Does that mean I have a problem?

Or, could I simply be a Mom with a virus, in the middle of spring cleaning??????

My typical day-over the course of this weekend:

1) Take my drugs.

2) Feed people.

3) Clean up the mess.

4) Sit on the couch.

5) Wait for drugs to work.

Once the drugs go into effect:

1) Clean something I just cleaned, yesterday.

2) Clean something new, that will need cleaning again, tomorrow.

3) Throw in a load of laundry.

4) Collapse on couch and watch clock until I can take drugs again….

5) Fold laundry. Place in basket. Don’t put it away. I’m sure this is because I desperately need a visual reminder of today’s housekeeping progress, NOT because I soooooo hate putting laundry away;)

Things I heard today:

“Mom I’m done with my tub…. I’m all Pringley” (As I can’t remember whether this child has ever seen a PRUNE.. Pringley as opposed to pruney could be a more apt description…..)

“I wish I had a reset button” (To which I replied: “Me too, Noah, Me too” )

Evidence of trippy spring cleaning:

Dryer lint is bothering me.

It creates a flammable, mystery coating over everything in my laundry room. I need to put a garbage can closer to the washer so I don’t “float” it across the room anymore… (Although, making a basket with dryer lint from 6 feet away is sometimes way up there on my list of daily accomplishments. )

For about 3 seconds, I wondered if there could be some valuable re-purposing of dryer lint. Apparently, I’m not the first to wonder about….making paper… or spinning with lint….. Don’t call my next of kin to have me admitted… I got over it.

However- I have managed to fry the rubber backing, on every throw rug in the house. Just a PSA to remember to ajust dryer temperature between towels and throw rugs. FYI- It turns into lovely crumbles- resembling beige bacon bits, when tossed about the salad-like mess of my laundry room. (Can you tell today was clean the laundry room day?)

Today’s shocking experience:

Vacuuming the cold air returns. I suppose I don’t pay attention to them… but, OH MY WORD! DISGUSTING! They have been functioning as special dust-scented room fresheners, I’m sure.

Can you tell I’m avoiding cleaning the big bath-tub??????????

I think I’ll take a nap.

Knitting content:

Well- as cold medicine and following a pattern are not a great blend- not much! Still on the sleeves of my pink CPH.

Dear Lord- please help me balance getting rest and getting the spring cleaning done… and mostly- Lord- please help me with my attitude… I want to serve with gladness… not with crankiness- amen.

 

Spring Cleaning and the Smell of Burnt Pickles….

Oh the Mop and the pail- such cruel mistresses. It’s true, although snow continues to spit at the most in-opportune moments, (like Easter Morning- what’s up with that?) the time for Spring Cleaning has arrived.

Let’s just say-at my house, it’s about 2 years over due.

As Spring cleaning hasn’t visited us in a while…. I knew I’d need heavy duty help- and not just of the chemical kind. (If you’re planning this years stock purchases— I’d suggest- buying Windex, Bounty, Mop & Glow and Clorox… my chemicals of choice) Anyway- I went to “Fly Lady.net” and signed up.

This goes against everything within me, as one of my favorite phrases is “You’re not the boss of me!” (There are a myriad of reasons some not so altruistic as to why I am a SAHM….;) Flylady.net sends you a daily email with reminders for developing new habits and with missions for specific focus areas to clean. Accountability and encouragement all in one shot.

Yesterday, was “refridgerator day.” Always an interesting task with 3 boys. They have a strong tendancy to not QUITE replace the caps and lids, prior to putting things away. The resulting drips created some recipes that will NEVER make it to Martha Stewart. Most of the puddle experiments contained: Caramel or chocolate syrup, cold and or cough medicine, jelly of every flavor, something that looks like honey, liberal dollops of ketchup and various salad dressings.

I’ll admit- they were a bit Jackson Pollock-esque… But, not really art. Nor culinary delights. There was no taste testing. These recipes/art were discarded . The fridge is now clean. (Well- it was the last time I checked, but that was around breakfast- anything could have happened by now.)

I’m just glad the Fly-lady didn’t say “fridge and FREEZER.” Hey if she’s gonna boss me- I’m just gonna do what she says… no point going over board! I left the coffee grounds loose frozen corn and ice cream drips for another day.

Today- was “clean the kitchen cabinet fronts” day. Interestingly enough- the same drips from the fridge seemed to have migrated to the cabinet fronts. A Tip: Spray cleaner then LET IT SIT for a few minutes! Much easier than trying to scrape dried jelly with your fingernails. (gotta love those acrylic tools- I mean nails;)

I couldn’t stand to have clean cabinet fronts and drippy appliance fronts- so I did them too. Then—- the oven and stovetop beckoned to me ominously. They were mocking me. They must be cleaned- “Fly Lady or no.” (Besides- she’s not really the boss of me!)

A few things about self cleaning ovens:

1) You need to scrape the burn food out FIRST.
2) You CAN put your drip pans and grates into the oven and clean them at the same time—- but again- they should be scraped of burnt spaghetti sauce and ramen noodles FIRST.
3) The stove top becomes HOT. If you decide to utilize the self cleaning cycle to clean under the drip pans etc…. be cautious of your cleaning chemical choice. HOT CHEMICALS CAUSE FUMES……. Breathing HOT fumes could cause you to feel…. very mellow … maybe even a bit ummmmmm intoxicated….

If you fail to follow these instructions- your house will fill with smoke- right about the time you are feeling “mighty mellow.” OPEN THE WINDOWS- YOU ARE NOT IN COLLEGE even though it IS Spring Break. You are the Mom— you cannot get high in the kitchen! …Besides- this can’t be good for your pets. OPEN THE WINDOWS!

Some where- I once read that a small dish of white vinegar placed out will remove smoke and other odors from your home. Liars. THIS DOES NOT WORK for self-cleaning oven trauma…… it just makes your house smell like BURNT PICKLES. I doubt “Yankee Candle” Is interested in this as part of it’s new Spring line.

Good luck with your Spring Cleaning…..I’m going to knit (I need a sweater it’s FREEZING in here, and the smoke hasn’t abated yet!) until it’s time to GO OUT FOR DINNER……No One will be cooking in that CLEAN KITCHEN today.

I wonder what’s on the docket for tomorrow? Click for the week in review-advance:

“Fly Lady.net”

Actual Knitting content: CPH # In Cascade Sierra- Back and fronts done- working the sleeves….

PS— If I get pneumonia from the cold and chemical damage to my lungs……can I have a day off?