For much of my mothering journey, I’ve been surrounded by moms who are [for the most part] like me. We shop the same stores. We get the same haircuts. We send our children to the same schools and activities. We have the same rules. We have the same struggles and triumphs. We understand each other.
It’s nice and safe. At least, it’s the same.
But, is it good? Is it best? Is this what God has in mind? Is this how it has to be?
I treasure my relationships with women like me. There is something incredibly validating about meeting another mom who has faced similar challenges and made similar decisions.
But, is that all there is? Not in my experience.
Actually- My deepest and most meaningful relationships have been with mothers who are different from me. These are more than validating. they are challenging and stretch me and make me think. These are the relationships that expand my capability for empathy and sympathy. They change my perspective to a bigger picture and wider possibilities of mothering than my tiny micro-culture of moms like me does.
Knowing this by experience, has raised questions that make me uncomfortable:
“Why do I segregate myself as a mother?” “Am I afraid?” “What am I afraid of?” “Why do I most often stick with moms like me? “Am I the only one who does this?” “Can I really connect with mom’s who are different from me, or is it a fluke when it happens?” “Is it worth the extra effort and energy that it requires to connect with mom’s who are different?” “What is best?”
“What would happen if we stopped living as mothering micro-cultures and started living as a united mothering community?”
“What’s it really like to be that “other” mom?”
My goal in this project is to walk a mile (or 10) in the shoes of moms and find out the answers. I want to experience, understand and communicate what their lives are really like. I want my misperceptions and prejudices to be shattered by the truth. I want to get know and listen to the moms who “live” there.
I look forward to sharing this journey with you and getting to know you in the process!